Good Intentions and Bad Habits

"I'm not going to walk to my appointment tonight. I'm tired. That's it, I'm driving."

"But if I don't walk I'm going to feel crappy later, I'll feel like a dud for skipping my walk and not accomplishing anything."

"Ah, but I'm tired so I'll just relax for an hour and then drive."

"But what will I do? Sit around on the couch for an hour? I should walk."

"But If I'm going to walk I need to leave now and I want to relax for a while."

"Though If I walk I might feel better after. Who am I kidding? I know I'll feel better. I'm just going to change and leave for my walk and stop thinking about it."

Oh those battles. Getting myself out the door for my walk on Tuesday was no easy feat. My good intentions and my bad habits had it out. My good intentions won! I had a similar battle to get myself to swim class this past Monday. At 5pm I was definitely not going. By 5:45 I was in my swimsuit and heading out the door. Making it to that swim class was no small victory. Fortunately it wasn't such a battle getting to swim class tonight. I wore my heart rate monitor again and burned 600 calories in the 1.5 hour class.

You win some, you lose some. That's what they say. And I lost some this week too. On Monday night I waited too long to eat and ended up giving in to a fast food hamburger and two tacos for dinner. Then in our 2 hour staff meeting on Tuesday I had a huge chocolate chip cookie, followed by a slice of lemon pound cake a 1/2 hour later and later, a mini brownie. I can't say I'm proud of these choices. I also didn't get any activity in this past weekend. First time in a long time I've been inactive all weekend. Proves that I need to have plans or I end up with nothing doing.

I realized on Monday that I'm under a lot of stress. The work thing has been stressful. I've never been jobless when I didn't want to be. I also have a family thing that is highly stressful (not pregnancy related at all). And then the pregnancy, diet/nutrition/exercise issue adds a little stress. Generally I think I was in denial about the overall stress level. I don't know if the food choices are related to that or not. Sometimes I think I have just so much fight in me and when times get tough and my fight gets focused on other things I give in to the food. Live and learn.

So the work thing may be resolved. I don't want to jinx it so I'll hold off on making any official announcements but my stress in that area is easing up. More to come.

Oh! I have all my plans for the Marin Triathlon firmed up. I've got a swimmer and a cyclist lined up and I'll be doing the run. I'm very excited!! When I got pregnant I thought that meant the event was out. I am very pleased to still be participating. I plan to do a walk/run combo based on my heart rate. It's 6 miles and I think that's very doable. Still, I plan to sneak Miguel on the run course with me - If I poop out or otherwise need to stop we're going to switch the timing chip and number to him and he'll carry the torch to the finish line. He's my pinch runner!

Well, I need to start thinking about my weekend plans. Don't want to end up doing nothing again. The weather is supposed to be rainy and chilly on Saturday so I'll have to get creative. Haven't been to the gym in months so maybe it'll be our time to get reacquainted.

The Good, The Bad, and the Wonderful

Forgive me Al Gore for I have sinned, it has been 6 days since my last blog post.

As far as my week goes...

The Good:

1. Tracked...for a full seven days!
2. Got in an extra day of exercise when I walked 3.5 miles to an appointment instead of driving.
3. Had vegetables with nearly every dinner.
4. Started process of changing workout room to baby room.
5. Received four bags of cute baby boy clothes from a friend!

The Bad:

1. Gave in to temptation at the office...more than once. No, I didn't have an affair with the geeky/sexy finance guy. It was See's Candy. And peanut M&M's.
2. Was insufferably irritable for 2 days straight and for the first time really wanted a glass of wine. I was so cranky Miguel informed me he's never getting me pregnant again. I had ice cream for dinner that night.
3. So far this weekend I haven't done any recreational stuff. And if I don't do something today that extra day of exercise will no longer be an extra day.
4. Am getting laid off at the end of October.
5. Chocolate covered peanut-butter-stuffed pretzel squares. Mitigating factor: There were about 10 left and I stuffed 'em down the garbage disposal.

The Wonderful:

1. Haven't gained any weight according to the scale this morning.
2. In the middle of the night last night when I came back from the restroom Miguel reached over and put his hand on my belly.
3. Mom offered to pay for my Cobra health insurance premiums after I'm laid off. Oh, and thank you in advance America, i.e. Taxpayers, for unemployment benefits.
4. Shoshana made goal! We all know what a huge accomplishment this is. Congratulations Shosh! You worked hard, you persevered, and you ROCK!