Starting Fresh, In This Moment

I had so much more I wanted to get done yesterday. I bet most of you can relate.

So I had an appointment with my doc in the morning. Not only is she a great doctor, she indulged me in a selfie! Gotta love that.

Anyway, this was a follow-up to my appointment with Dr I'm-so-busy three weeks. Can you tell I'm still irritated? I need to get over it.

Anyway, yesterday we talked about how I'm not coughing and the wheezing is much improved but still sometimes flares up. So she's sending me for a pulmonary function test to see what's happening there and to an allergist (thank you to the reader that suggested I ask about that) to see if there might be allergy triggers.

Other than that, I got a haircut...Thanks Susana!

And also did a lot of blog-related stuff. Blog maintenance work is surprisingly time consuming. And then...I went to the gym. I started with 25 minutes on the elliptical. I'm always surprised at what a tough workout you can get from that machine. I got off all sweaty and out of breath! Then I did a little bit of weights again, taking a stab at some shoulder and back stuff. I'm so wanting to be able to do what I did before and also know that's going to take time. The fact that I'm so enthusiastic about it is a great sign though!

Ok, last thing...my eating. Last night...do we have to talk about this? Yes, it always helps when I put it out there. I'm just going to write it...two bowls of Fruit Loops (don't ask why these are even in the house (hint: it's Miguel's fault) - lame excuse, I am entirely responsible for both keeping them in the house and for eating them), two chocolate chip cookies (the rest of which are now gone) and a random mix of snacks while cooking dinner (food I found left in the kids lunch pail - granola bar, string cheese) and other food I just sought out for no good reason - pita chips and possibly something else I'm not remembering.

So today I woke up feeling disappointed in myself. Mostly that I'm in a hole and yet continue to dig. I  did a lot of self talk.

"What's done is done, don't let it bring you down today."
"Yesterday's mistakes are already in the past, let them go."
"I've done nothing that can't be undone through making healthier choices."
"THIS feeling is why I want to make better choices, I don't feel good. The food was a temporary feel-good, this negative feeling is worse and not worth it."
"There are other ways to soothe myself in the evening."

You get the idea. So today I'm making better choices, right? Not so much. I'm on a lunch break at an all day training. Someone brought Girl Scout cookies and Almond Roca. I've been snacking on those. I brought a Fage, a banana and mandarins. I am committing, right now, for myself, to eat no more GS cookies or Almond Roca. I'm going to think out loud here for a moment..."I know I will feel better at the close of the day if I keep my commitment to myself, I can do this, for me, because I want something more, something that Girl Scout cookies and Almond Roca won't give me."

There, I feel a bit better already. Thanks for listening.

Two Piece Update

First off, I have to tell you, I am loving this Instagram thing. If you're following me then you already know, I'm going a little crazy with the picture posting. For those of you not familiar with Instagram, it's a photo-sharing website. A little like Facebook but instead of just following your friends (or vice versa) you can follow whoever suits your fancy (unless they have their page set to "private"). And then your "feed" is filled with pictures posted by the people you follow.

Here's a screenshot of my page to give you an idea of the pictures I'm posting. Mostly food and selfies but once I'm back at the exercise thing I'll start posting more pics of that too. And yes, that's a margarita.

So I have two pieces of news, no pun intended. The first is...I wore a bikini in public! This is not the first time (I did it once before), but it's the first time post-tummy tuck. What a difference! I still felt a little funny, in a I'm-not-quite-wearing-enough-clothes sort of way, but I got used to it as the day went on.

This was on Mother's Day. We stayed at my mom's the night before and had a lazy Sunday morning and her house. Then we went to the pool and met up with my mom-runner-friend Catherine and lounged there for most of the rest of the day. Don't get me started on all the food I ate. And we're not talking salads and carrot sticks either. But I'm going with the flow. I know once I get back to my regular exercise routine things will improve overall.

Which...brings me to the second piece of news...I went to the gym today. Yippee! I'm five weeks post-op today and while I have to wait one more week before I can start lifting weights, I'm clear to do anything else that feels good. So I started on the upright bike. I decided to just set the time/level to my old one, 25 minutes level 8, and go for it. I couldn't quite keep up my old pace but I lumbered through the whole 25 minutes and felt better for it.

After that I decided to do just a wee bit of strength training. Shh...I did a couple set of squats (no weights), some cable triceps stuff, bicep curls and one set of chest presses. Light weights, no pressure. Except that I tried to do a pushup. Bad idea. I got into position and that was fine but when I started to drop down, no bueno. Ok, so hold off on the pushups. But everything else was good. All-in-all I was there for about 40 minutes. The stress had been building, it was so good to sweat a little. Can't you tell by my post-workout smile?

I came home and decided that since I was in my gym clothes and it was really warm out, it would be fun to take the kids on a cruise around the neighborhood. They rode their bikes/scootered and I ran. Slow and easy with lots of starts and stops, but still running. My new shoes were comfy, though I wondered how they might be after several miles given how minimalist they are (not a whole lot of padding between my foot and the ground).

inov-8 runners. aren't they cute?!

It was fun to run, even under those circumstances. I'm looking forward to my first time back out there. And it will definitely be an "out there" run, not a treadmill one. I'll need to listen to my body and be able to make all those micro-pace adjustments you make when you're running outside. So I'd set the goal to exercise three times this week. One down, two to go. Easy peasey!