Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Change is Hard.

Yesterday in the afternoon at work I started feeling nauseous. I had a 7pm appt so I decided to skip my workout and go home until the appt. After the appt I felt better so I worked out.

Today, started feeling nauseous again. 100% not-pregnant if you were wondering. But who knows why? I don't.

Anyway, I was feeling really tired too, yawning all afternoon (then realized I never finished my morning coffee, so I think that's why I was so tired all day). I was trying to push myself to go to the gym, telling myself I had to go, etc. Then I asked a co-worker what she thought. She said, "you know, when I feel that way I don't go. I want the gym to be something I want to do, if I force myself to go when I'm feeling like you are I start to hate it."

That was the most perfect thing to hear. I'm trying so hard to change my attitude toward the gym and then I get this black & white thinking, like I have to go. I've missed one day this week (hangover on Sunday) and if I miss today but go the rest of the week I'll reach my goal of going 5 times this week. But I've also allowed that some weeks I will only go 4 times and that's okay.

I'm still working on that stationary bike. I'm up to 10 min sustained on level 3 two times in 30 minutes. But it's HARD. My heart-rate got up to 167. So I do 5 min Level 2, 10 min Level 3, 5 @ 2 and then 10 @ 3. I met with the trainer again. It went much better this time and he split my routine up into upper and lower body like I wanted.

Anyway, I want to feel good about my choices, and start to think differently, not this on-or-off mentality I've had for so many years. So, weigh-in tomorrow. Let's hope the three holiday parties don't stop me from losing at least a little this week.